Goldfinger on Prime Video — He Loves Only Gold
I am now in my 3rd movie of my James Bond movie marathon. The last two movies were a showcase for James Bond. Of course, the many, many colorful characters, especially on the villainous side. This time though, I have to admit, in this entire collection of my thoughts, I will be spending most of my discussion on the villain’s plan, the henchmen and of course, Mr. Goldfinger himself.
The James Bond movie series starts off with a bang from the first movie itself. They are going higher and higher with each feature. I confess that the bad/less than perfect adventures are only a few movies away, but, I will keep enjoying them while I can.
Bond Is Constantly Insulted For Humor
The James Bond movies, as with any proper action movie, is littered with generous amount of humor. A lot of times, these humorous events come at the expense of the villain or some supporting character and such. Yet, I am seeing this from Dr. No, Bond, the main hero, the cool guy, the supposed alpha male, is almost always the target of insults and comedy.
Once again, Bond’s penchant of showing off and endless juvenile behavior are frowned upon. By now, I know that Bond wants to impress Money Penny, more than any other woman in the world. So, he does the hat throwing thing and says some lame ‘smart’ line. This time, Money Penny does the hat trick before Bond can!
I cannot explain why I love the ‘Bond Meets Money Penny, Flirts and Fails and Gets owned by both Money Penny and M’ sequences.
And then, as if these insults are not enough, now, we have Q also finding innovative ways of making fun of Bond.
I think, they all, admire his work. I get this feeling that most 00 agents are like 007. Childish men who get excited because of gadgets, women and thrill of adventure. License to kill, but also, ready to die, as well. It’s possible that most of them are orphans, which is why they think their office as their home.
M is the dad. Money Penny is the flirty cousin. Q is like grandpa. A life with no friends or family but random encounters with exotic women who almost always die after a few minutes of sex. It’s a lonely life that these secret agents live.
Meanwhile, now that I have spent so much time with Connery’s Bond, I am beginning to see that, like Moore and Brosnan, Connery absolutely loves being James Bond. I have seen him in other movies, and I am beginning to see that he is truly a great actor.
I am also beginning to see that Indian Jones are essential Spielberg doing his own version of James Bond, as he never go to make one himself. Indiana Jones and James Bond are the same person. They even smirk in a similar fashion.
Templating Future Bond Movies
At last, I am finally beginning to see the exact moment where the ‘James Bond Formula’ was perfected. The cold open scene where a non-essential action sequence takes place. Blowing up a secret base of something. Coolly changing into a casual costume by removing spy wear and such. Walking amongst general public when something dangerous happens.
I distinctly remember this being recreated/parodies in True Lies. True Lies is essentially a James Bond movie by James Cameron with Arnold. With a super hot lingerie dance and loud explosions. Just like James Bond!
The opening credits song. I was really beginning to miss it in the first two James Bond movies. The standard issue ‘show women silhouettes and bodyscapes’ thing was there but with a lyric less music. I am still humming “Goldfinger….tananaaaa” all the time.
It’s a catchy song.
Pretty girl, beware of his heart of gold. This heart is cold
The many, repeated confrontations with the main villain in social and not so social settings. The explanation of the ludicrous plot. Bond getting captured but escaping anyway. Some kind of mid-movie massive chase or confrontation where bond has to use majority of his gadgets to survive the onslaught of the numerous foot soldiers.
Finally, some big shoot out, explanations. The villain finally becoming dumb, and getting himself killed, despite having every opportunity to escape and fight another day.
Finally, bond ends up kissing or making out or intercoursing with the bond girl, who has not yet died during the course of the movie.
GoldFinger — Better Than Bond
The last two movies opted for a more ‘ominous’ presence of the villains. Dr. No only showed up for a few minutes. BloField was entirely missing in the 2nd one, except for a shot below the neck. This time, we have a villain who is present from the beginning. Like a general who leads from the front, Goldfinger takes James Bond, head on.
At the end of the day, Goldfinger is a smuggler, but at a global scale. However, he loves gold and he wants to do anything he can increase its value. So, he teams up with all sorts of villainous characters. He also appears to be very good at building a network. Or perhaps, it is SPECTRE pulling the strings. Goldfinger is smart. He outwits Bond, CIA and MI6 at every turn.
At the end of the movie, he even came prepared for the eventuality that his well thought out plan might go wrong. When things go bad, he switches to an American officer’s uniform. That’s very clever. Clever not because of the costume. Despite his massive intelligence, Goldfinger imagined a scenario that his plan might fail, and he may have to escape.
Bond villains usually don’t have such humbleness. They seem to think that they will never fail. If anything, Goldfinger only lost because, perhaps, as it happens with such larger than life individuals, he could not accept defeat at the hands of a low level government operative such as James Bond.
Not only is Goldfinger himself a smart guy, he has surrounded himself with practical henchmen who are efficient, clever and ruthless. There is no way anyone forget the cruel way the first Bond girl is taken out. Not with a gun or a knife but a gold plated skin. There is the added cruelty that the murder was committed while Bond lay unconscious in the same room.
He also appears to be quiet polite. At some point, he seems to show interest in Pussy Galore. He politely expresses his interest in her by touching her hand. However, she ignores his touch. Immediately, Goldfinger accepts that she does not want him. He immediately withdraws his hand, and moves on with his business. He continues to treat her with respect, despite the rejection.
He is an evil megalomaniac who killed a woman earlier by painting her skin. However, he won’t reduce himself to forcing himself of a women under his employ.
OddJob, Pussy Galore and Fort Knox
Every bond movie, even the bad ones that I will soon be watching, have innovative villains.
This time, we have OddJob, a crazy, non-speaking short man with a talent for innovative deaths. I am fairly certain that OddJob came up with the idea of death by painting. Goldfinger probably replaced the paint with Gold. These two guys are like best buds. They probably spent their weekends watching Opera and discussing what other creative, cruel way they can kill their enemies.
The presence of OddJob is natural for a movie like James Bond. What is fascinating is the presence of Pussy Galore. Pussy Galore! I cannot stop laughing that this actually is an actual named character. Of course, we have had other names like, Strawberry Fields. Anyway, Pussy Galore.
*stops typing to laugh a lot*
Anyway. Pussy Galore. Okay, I got to stop laughing at the naughtiness, the audacity to use this name. I remember, watching her scene as a kid. Back then, I did not understand what she meant, when she said, “immune’. Now, I think, she was trying to say that she is a lesbian, or perhaps, bisexual. She eventually does fall for James Bond. So, perhaps, she was always was a bisexual but only explored the lesbian side of her.
Perhaps, Bond realized it too, with his extensive experience with women that she is bisexual. This is still a movie from the 1960s. So, I found it interesting that the makers of the movie managed to squeeze in a bisexual character to the story. She wasn’t even sexualized or anything. Folks will say that the old movies were overtly sexualized, but, I don’t see it so far.
If anything, these movies are as progressive as they could get. They keep putting Connery is revealing clothes or make him run around topless while wearing short shorts.
All this, plus, that daring heist? Imagine Goldfinger’s balls. This Goldfinger guy, makes a plan to steal from the United States Army! How about that? He borrows a nuke, hires the services of an entire plane troupe, steals gold from the mob, and then proceeds to execute the theft. All this, whilst fully aware that the MI6 and the CIA are keeping an eye on him.
God! Does this guy have steel balls or what? Wait. Gold balls. Yeah, his balls are probably painted gold indeed.
Scoring
I am marathon watching the James Bond movies and I wish to rank them at the end. So, I came up with a numbering system. The scores for this one are here.
- Action and Stunts 9/9
- Coolness Cool 9/9
- Double Entendre and One Liners 9/9
- Hot Women 9/9
- Ludicrous Villainy, Cool Deaths and Traps 9/9
- Gadgets Man! 9/9
- General Awesomeness 9/9
- Boredom Factor 0/-9
Total : 63
Final Note
That’s three movies in a row that have managed to entertain me, get me pumped and excited. There is such a thing as Bond Villain stupidity, but, here, all I see one of the most smartest villains who lost due to a combination of bad luck and plot mandated good guy win.
Now that the bond formula has been perfected, I am ready for the next few movies of Sean Connery, with that one movie interrupted by Lazenby’s presence. After that, the funny man, Moore.
I work as a full time freelance coding tutor. Hire me at UpWork or Fiverr or Stack Overflow. My personal website is here. Find more of my art at Behance and Unsplash. Also, I have a Podcast.
